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Enneagram: Nine paths to success...Nine challenges for growth!The Enneagram THREE - Achiever - The effects of stressThe drive for people at THREE on the Enneagram is toward accomplishment, success, and status, in whatever way
they personally understand these goals. The result is that THREEs are the most productive of all the nine types.
An unintended result of their drive to accomplish can be that they burn themselves out — not listening to
hints from their bodies, minds, and hearts that they are incurring a terrific toll along the way.
Often portrayed as the heartless business person who only sees the bottom line or their personal advancement, the core secret of THREEs is that they are striving for love and approval, something that they concluded early could only be earned... by being "a success." The idea that they could be loved unconditionally, just for themselves, escapes the THREE. Therefore, when they are obstructed in their climb up the ladder of success they feel threatened, worrying (perhaps only unconsciously) that they will ever be worthy to be loved. When THREEs have a meltdown (perhaps caused by an outside catastrophe like a corporate layoff or by a physical breakdown from overwork and over-worry) they can sink into a morass of helplessness and indecision: reminiscent of NINEs who are in bad shape. This slide into NINE may feel both terrifying and relieving to THREEs: like having a fuse blown and being forced finally to just take it easy. As Michael Goldberg likes to say about THREEs, "they sold their heart's desire for success." It might be added, that eventually most THREEs realize at some level that they didn't get a very good deal on that sale. THREEs can therefore get a boost during difficult times by calling attention to their Enneagram "wings", the adjacent points on the circle. In particular, the introspective FOUR point (whose members are ever so aware of their heart longing and what they have missed) suggests an important question for THREEs to pose to themselves: "What is my heart's desire?" They may need to look at it repeatedly, ever deeper, to make sure they're going to the core, not just the outer image: "What really matters most to my heart?" THREEs may then be able to balance all their outer striving with a remembrance of "in the service of what is all my striving about?" Besides attending to their own heart, THREEs may also benefit by taking the TWO ("Helper") perspective and asking, "How are the feelings of people important to me being affected in this situation?" and "How could I really serve the feelings and needs of others here?" When THREEs start attending to the heart needs of themselves and of others they naturally starting expressing positive aspects of their "growth point": SIX ("Loyalist/Troubleshooter"). Then THREEs begin to trust that they don't have to achieve it all by themselves. They take the risk to trust the team that they're on. At SIX, THREEs drop the frantic forging ahead that can compel them to take on more and more overwhelming projects and goals. They can then be appropriately cautious and make real progress in a stable fashion.
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THREE is where
you find the classic "Type A" personality: hard-driving, barely reaching one goal before taking on two
more, and angrily impatient when their progress is frustrated.